Welcome Little Grandmother Stone

Bienvenida Abuelita piedra- by Lexie Mendelson

I love this story about the author’s time spent in ritual in a Temazcal, and with the animist wisdom that a grandmother can be represented and honored in more than human form.

A temazcal is a traditional Mexican sweat lodge ceremony from ancient Mesoamerican peoples. The word means ‘house of heat’ and the heated volcanic stones that are used to heat up the temazcal are revered as “grandmothers” or “abuelas”, honoring them as wise elder representatives of the ancestors.  Participants reflect on ancestors with gratitude and for guidance. The temazcal honors both the stone grandmothers that hold the heat and the human ancestors whose wisdom continues to nurture through generations.  This story depicts a temazcal experience. 

‘Bienvenida Abuelita piedra!’ (Welcome little Grandmother stone!) echoes around the barren, lightless, snare drum like cement structure we sit in, just a few inches from each other.  Thirty-three little Grandmother stones waiting to enter, for eleven women who are for now sitting on the hard floor with legs outstretched, backs against the wall, comfortably cool, and quiet with anticipation except for these three words we’ve been instructed to say each time an Abuelita enters the Temazcal. 

‘Bienvenida Abuelita piedra!’  Not Abuela, but Abuelita. The dainty, sweet, small, friendly version of Grandmother, more Grandma or Nan or Nanny than Grandmother. Something to make you feel at ease, some recognition of the stone coming with love to care for you, to gently guide you, to hold your hand as you cross into the unknown. But these little stones, like Abuelitas are strong, they are ancient volcanic rock, they will not crack under heat.  

‘Beinvenida Abuelita piedra!’ With the arrival of each stone from the crackling fire just outside our Temazcal, and carried on a pitchfork by one of our two shaman, they are placed into the fire pit at the center of this tiny solid building. Two of us are guided forward, closer to the stacked Abuelitas. With every new stone, we take turns making an intention through a promise to the Abuelitas by marking the stone with an ‘X’ using a wet gem stone. ‘I will remove limiting beliefs!’, ‘I will live in gratitude!’. The other participant touches the stone that received the intention twice with a deer antler, and then circles the antler skyward with a loud ‘Kawsayaya!’ to send the intention to the heavens. 

‘Beinvednida Abuelita piedra!’ After each Abuelita arrives, the small door is closed, the little space is almost completely pitch black, and the heat grows.  The shaman soaks herbs (oregano for the east, basil for the south, pepper plant for the west and finally chamomile for the north) in a bucket of water with a floating half grapefruit. The shaman then hits the Abuelitas with the soaked herbs which in response emit billows of steam into the shallow air.  Heat rolls around the Temazcal like a silent wave, at times suffocating and unbearable, but sometimes soothing and quiet.

‘Beinvenida Abuelita piedra!’ The heat, much more than a sauna, is intoxicating, making us droop, and sweat, and feel, and dream.  The shaman chants of ancestors, all our ancestors, for generations behind us, whose purpose is to prop us up and help us through this lifetime - our combined lifetime - the combined intent of me, my mother, my grandmother, her mother, my sister, their sisters. It is now that we start to realize the Abuelitas are guiding us through this hot whirlpool of mud like steam. The Abuelitas are gently poking through our dark corners, pushing around forbidden doors, opening previously locked windows and encouraging us to confront and let go of anything that is holding us back, telling us to reach for any dream we previously shut away. Letting us know that they are all here for us, now, today, every yesterday, every tomorrow. 

‘Ometeotl!’ ‘Beinvenida Abuelita piedra!” (Thank you to the ancient God of duality in Mexico/Aztec mythology) (Welcome little Grandmother rocks!”). Dark, hot, smokey, smelling of earth, feeling exhausted and reborn we promise the Abuelitas we will let go of anything that does not serve us, and we will bring into creation any wish previously hidden away.  We are newly aware of the unwavering support and guidance of generations of little Grandmothers. Grandmothers who are quietly sharing our struggles and our dreams, nudging us forward, holding our hands, making us stronger. Grandmothers who loudly defend us, fight for us and our communities and make us better. Grandmothers who share their knowledge, sometimes gently, sometimes fiercely, and push us all to new levels. 

Bienvenida Abuelita Piedra!

Author Bio: Lexie's professional life is in digital technology, but in her personal life she travels and writes as often as she can. She currently lives in NY with her Venezuelan husband and British-born son. Lexie lived abroad for almost 20 years in London, France, Monaco, Morocco and Spain and continues to make travel a priority, visiting Croatia, Greece, France, Italy, London, Spain, South Africa and of course Tulum, Mexico in the last few years. In Tulum she spent a magical week with a dozen inspirational women and experienced the Mayan temazcal for the first time. While in the temazcal Lexie was inspired by just how much the women in her life - family, old and new friends, colleagues and neighbors - have shaped her and her family's life, especially those very wise and 'grand' women who have been around the longest: her Grandmother Edna (Buffy), Grandmother Marion, Great Grandmother Hannah, Great Grandmother Frieda and her very special Great Aunt Janeth who taught her to laugh hard and host often!”